I have always had this intuitive guilt when I take myself on a shortly long sabbatical from blogging - but that’s not why I am writing.
The town, after 3 beautiful weeks of celebrating color (also reminding us again of why we should not contemplate suicide) went paler and thinner (after the leaves bade good byes) today. Winds have taken their time of the year, indicating – ‘get aside, I am gonna show what it’s like when you disrespect nature’ – yea, understandable –every dog has its day – I should say season. The depression dawned on me when I had to wear my first weather coat of the year. But that’s not why I am writing either. I hate winter !
I met another lady who hates winter much more than I do. After wriggling off the misty beads that found home on her jacket-braced arms, she shook her head in frustration, looking behind her shoulders, the hazy morning. “It makes me sick” , I tried to offer solace. She shook her head harder – I didn’t know if she agreed or hated me for talking about something she hated.
“Oh, try driving up to work at 4:00 Am everyday, honey. You haven’t seen anything yet”.
- Really, there are things I need to say thanks to.
I have for once in these many years, started listening to my body. It’s like coming of age. So no more shrugging off the tiny aches or reactions-to-my-hysteric-nothings or even cravings. I want to listen to them all and understand (tryin to) something that embodies me – my soul – my life. Guess the work out sessions are playing their influence – good to know – I wouldn’t have known my own heartbeats otherwise. These are things worth your time.
Last Saturday was Diwali. It wouldn’t mean a lot when families and friends are seven seas, seven mountains away. So mind half goes – who cares – why bother anyway ? But I think it’s the hangover of the changes that I want in myself these days, that I decided to celebrate it anyway. It ended up, well, half fun, half frustrating. Fun because we had surprise guests who stayed till midnight and frustrating because they went “oh, dear, you really shouldn’t have bothered living half a day in the kitchen for a biriyani that tastes like this !!!!”. It went past me I guess - am more into the meditative trance now. (What!!???)).
Over to matters that matter right now – I really, really have gotten back my love for writing. In fact it’s a little over the board this time that I am already thinking of compiling my short stories for my yet-to-be-titled book. When it’s too much, I know it’s like a just-opened can of beer and before the fizz dies, I will Shut up !!!