Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Another year gone...

And the end of another year ! Sometimes I stop and stare at Life cruising along, least bothered about if I am able to keep pace. The race is on with a mob of rats and am doubtlessly one, racing, sometimes not knowing where. Wish to stop and take a road, not wandered on by my straying footsteps. But then, they are not too sturdy, my feet I mean. I get bored easily and my volatile mind wants to try too many things. Anyways, I am just sitting here, thinking about the emotional ride I was on, through out 2007. By the end of it, I gasp at the number of mistakes I had done, so much to learn from and the least happening, so much to do and more importantly so much not to do.

The year has been kind, overall. It’s like life taking a more meaningful dimension altogether with newer relationships every year. Family and friends, some new, some gold and old, aren’t they the sole reason for the beauty of waking up to face another day with a smile? Life is void, sans love, yea, with years,I realize it is. Imagine being part of a crowd and not knowing a soul !That cannot be life! All my insane philosophies apart, I feel so thankful for having people to love and be loved beyond conditions or limitations. So grateful for keeping my loved ones out of all the horrific mishaps and accidents and bomb blasts, over the year. It spooks the hell out of me to question or imagine how guaranteed safety could be. My friend says, don’t question, don’t imagine, just thank god we are doing fine today. That’s probably the way of being happy.

Adding to the wish list this year would be a strong will to actually do things that bring in joy and meaning and purpose to life and not just sit and stare and do the talking only to the computer. When I do not want to reach any place the train is going to, why would I just have to be in it ? I wanna step out and make my own road, taking for granted I will still have the money to pay my bills.

I am learning to let go of some of those memories, which are sometimes too intense, in a nice or not-so-nice way. I wish I could be more forgiving towards life as life has been to my mistakes. Perhaps I am growing. I can feel the slow transformation of turning into a young woman from a careless girl. I wanna fill in more care, strength, peace, hope and love to my soul, letting life add grace to my age.

At the end of it, Thank you and good bye to another fantastic year, you made me a bit wiser. Scooping up some hope, I wish the year gets so wonderful and adventurous and beautiful by all means, bringing the world to be at peace with itself.
I wish every one more of the best gifts of life, this year and every year to come.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Taare Zameen Par

Did I just sign off with the best movies of the year after watching Chak De and Jab We Met ?Yes I did and looks like I was far too much in haste while doing so or that was just a superstition, sarcastically drawing a line on Indian Cinema. But I had to hold my breath and gasp in adoration because I just saw one of the most wonderful movies I have ever seen !!! Taare Zameen Par is something every one, in a child's life MUST see. The little nuances that mould a child, the tool a teacher has in making a great human being, the most sensitive and emotional bondings a kid develops with his family and a lot more that goes into the wonderful experience of growing up, the movie has captured it all in a way that must be seen to feel. A gem and a clear product of the genius in Aamir Khan, Taare Zameen Par has proved good cinema does not really require to follow a conventional formula, it just needs to reach the heart of a simple viewer, by way of a fantastic story, life takes us through.

Monday, December 17, 2007

College, A Memoir...

I was in a scurry sorting out the books I read this year and stumbled over the college slam book, memories and friendships, signed and closed. Four years since it was last touched, yes, time hasn’t really permitted me to re-read those notes from the best years life could offer.

I lay on the couch, swirling a couple of strands of my curly hair and feel this trwaing-trwaing roll of white faded curls in a plain backdrop, taking me through these intense moments of college years; the best life has given me thus far.

The beautiful me - Haven’t you had this sudden transformation of getting conscious and more chilled out about your looks, as you enter college? I did, and I think it’s natural with all ‘cause until school was over, we were so used to projecting ourselves like nerds, you know, plaited hair, uniform, those boring black leather shoes, bags weighing our spines down all the time and all that. Nothing mattered more than marks those days, nothing at all. Thank god, I was finally rid of being an ugly betty. It was thrillingly fun to take time in the mornings to dress up and leave hair loose and wear all sorts of colored fabrics and head to college with a bag which carried more of CDs and fun books to exchange. This is the phase that actually made me feel the girl in me.

The first love
– Well, they say, no matter how much life thrusts you with, the memories of a romance, which worked or did not will linger on for a lifetime. And I for obvious reasons, was not surprised when thoughts of those moments bubbled up, triggering goose bumps and a sense of bliss only love can bring. Waiting for each other in the class, exchanging boxes of chocolates, turning with a reason to talk to a friend but stealing looks, chit chatting on the phone till dawn and not being able to wait to get to college to catch up again, staying in the classrooms after college hours with a friend to guard the entrance, experiencing the beginning of what romance is, the special meetings arranged over annual and symposium days, the anxiety over a mysterious future, the last day of signing up autographs and bidding goodbyes, promising love for a life time and all the mix of joy and thrill and fear and strength and loneliness and longings, life can bring when you know you are in love, I don’t know if there is any other experience in life which takes you through a steep and exciting ride of emotions as much as love does. It’s been 8 years since I first had this guilty instinct warning me that I was falling in love. I didn’t want to, but eventually I did like every one else. The memory is still so very precious.

- You finally learn to sit back, put an arm over your friend’s and let go of anything that used to scare you till the end of school - books, teachers, classes, labs, assignments, marks ,you just forget them all and smile. Those lunch hours, when we would sit on the fence, laughing over the silliest things in the world, forgetting the test assigned for the later half of the day ; the lost stares we would give each other while giving a test, I remember scribbling down the recipe of Vanilla Cake so studiously for an Electronics and Design test, simply to save the “you-people-are-hopeless” kind of look from my teacher ,which made my best friend burn in despair ‘cause she thought I was actually giving in the answers ; the nick names we used to carol around for almost every one; ganging up to spend some sleepless nights on the eve of exams, I remember calling up pals like at about 2 or 3 in the night, to discuss subjects; sighing out the relief on clearing semesters, partying over any and every reason with the little pocket money dad used to spare, oh gosh, why did College have to get over ?

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Movie Reviews for the week.

Jab We Met

I really had this smile on through out the movie. Amidst all the movies that have come out recently on confused and confusing boy-girl relationships, Jab We Met was like licking a melting cone ice cream. Simple and sleek, romantic and beautiful. Though with the obvious shadows of DDLJ in some parts, Jab we Met is the best one I could catch in 2007, absolutely. And yea, I never thought I would love Kareena in a movie until this one.

13 going on 30.

Jennifer Garner doesn’t look juvenile enough to me to do romantic comedies. But 13 going on 30 was the pick for her. It’s completely imaginary. I mean, having a 13th birthday someday and the next morning you find yourself to be a 30 year old and successful and thriving and rocking??? Ridiculous isn’t it ? But that’s what she goes through and I liked the adventure. A pick for one of those Saturday evenings when you don’t really feel like going out.

Ice Princess

A fantastic theme! Do what you really want to do with life. But the whole story as such did not really keep me to it, probably because they couldn’t add more fun to the seriousness of the theme. And the characters, I felt lacked a little strength, especially Casy’s (the female protagonist’s) coach. And yea, the story is by Meg Cabot? You know the author of the Princess Diaries series. Well, perhaps not all books look good when translated into movies, I say.

Monday, December 10, 2007

The Shringaram about Chennai.

People, people every where, not a soul to stop around; that’s Chennai in a phrase to me. Every time I visit this place, the space has crunched further and people have expanded mercilessly beyond what the city can hold. Time seems to be a friend, long forgotten and nothing seems to stop to at least sigh. I don’t really care if you head up against me in the road as long as you don’t damage my car. I have no reason to tell you have been driving like mad because everybody does. People and more people, I was one among them and I had to like every 5 minutes, push myself a little harder to keep with the pace; when I had to place order for my food, when I had to ask the cab driver if he would take me to a place, when I was using the ATM or when I was paying my bill, there is a natural fast belt that keeps life on the move in here. Chennai, I would say, is a people’s city, the growth, the uplift in life style, the ever increasing space-constraint and all the facts that make the city as wonderful as it is, well, I can only think of one reason, people and more people.

It’s a cool December week, slowly creeping over the weekend and thankfully the climate plays a friendly host. I do not know the city. I don’t think I would ever, but I pretend to do so, conveniently when I speak to people and I believe it is to safe guard the lie that I knew the city and you couldn’t cheat. “This is not my kinda place, ma” I heard myself tell amma when she was talking about how quick the returns would be if you invested in Chennai’s real estate. When I told her I would rather invest in a place like Coimbatore, I saw her sigh and I think she told appa that I was hopeless in building money. Yea, that I am, I always knew that.

But strangely and almost always, I feel at home when I stray around the streets in Chennai. And coincidentally I have rarely had to put up with the city’s summer, prompting me to count another reason to like or dislike the place. I think I like it, I really do, but not in comparison with the other cities I have lived in. I expect more space and a relaxed pace to live life. I wouldn’t want to spend more time traveling than I would in the actual destination. I wouldn’t mind if it was crowded. But I need to have that time to stop and talk to a person, if in need. I don’t know, Bangalore is nothing short of crowded either. And the traffic is crazier because there is lesser space. People sprint for a hide-out which gets more crowded on weekends than how an office would be on a week day. I still have a never-ending crush for the place.

There is something new Chennai has in store for my each visit. The new mall Citi Center resembled Forum to me but surprisingly less crowded. I think I feel nostalgic about Spencers every time I visit and hence would choose to say Spencers remains the hottest spot to hang out despite getting a little older and withered. After hanging around the multiplex-and-branded-stored-malls for a day, it was and it has always been excitingly convincing and tiring at the same time to bargain and do street shopping through Pondy bazaar. After all, what would a trip to Chennai mean sans buying loads of goodies.

After a couple of days of romancing with the Singara Chennai, it was time to pack off and leave. On my way back from the city, my cabbie wants to know if I belonged to the place. I smile and give him a No. We were driving through Sterling road, Nungambakkam and the lights and the hoardings were brilliant.
“Can we reach in one hour ?”, amma asks him looking at the blocked traffic. He politely says, ‘I will try ma’ and the next half an hour he took us through the shortest but bumpiest routes possible, or at least we believed, to avoid the wait at signals so we get to board the flight in time. We smile at him thankfully after paying and he asks “inime eppo varuveenga?” (When will you come again)”.
Varuvom, seekrama”, Appa replies (We will, soon ), signing ourselves out of the city.

Yet again, I get convinced by the truth that this is the thing that brings life to the popularly favorite Chennai, its people.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Top 10 reasons why I am not blogging much !

1. Sitting jobless at office. This is not intriguing ‘coz when I really find time to do things I love, I don’t end up actually doing them. I can do things only when I make time out of the crazy schedules.

2. Reading, I have been into this 1-800-where-r-u series by Meg Cabot at office (now that I am actually jobless at office, there’s nothing wrong keeping company to a book, you see).

3.I find my fellow bloggers have become a wee bit sluggish too . I think I am losing the move-on spirit. Now, that’s not an excuse, I know.

4.Life seeming to have slowed down a bit, there isn’t much inspiring me to write about. May be I have learnt to love the I-don’t-have-time-to-breathe days. I could draw inspiration from my own crazy self.

5.I can’t stop mulling over why don’t I just quit this profession of writing software.

6.It’s discouraging when you know you just can’t and you can’t really get over it especially when you have all the time in the world to think about it.

7.My machine crashed yesterday and I had to let go of some of my important e-mails, let alone my favorite music and pictures.

8.Someone just asked me if my cat died. And I was like ‘WHAT?’. He didn’t bother to explain, but I guess I look like sulking over my cat’s death, but HELLO, I don’t even HAVE a cat !!! (Finger to self- That’s not a reason for not blogging).

9.I think I have really loved Enrique’s Insomniac. I have been hanging over it for the last one week, thanks again to no job at office.

10.I think I have come to the most factual part of it all. It’s insane, it’s dreadful, it can win your boss’s hatred for you. It’s called laziness and it has been my best friend for the last one whole week.