I thought..

If Life is the biggest school I am enrolled with, I am obliged to do and redo the greatest piece of homework, every night. Things I learnt transform into new things altogether after I believe I have caught them neatly printed in my learning book.
For instance,

I thought life was a risky gamble. You play it safe; you win. But it turns out that the best way to live life is by experimenting with it.

I thought movie titles were a prelude to the movie. If movies were to be judged by their names, I would never have chosen to watch Monsters Inc.

I thought days in July seemed longer because of psychological reasons. Some kid’s book told me it’s because the earth is closest to the sun during the month.

I thought Punjabi food was the most overrated Indian cuisine, with the annoyingly extensive usage of ghee in chicken. I was bowled over when I saw plain strips of ham baked in honey, eaten lusciously as one of the best celebrated food in America.

I thought failure is what I feared the most until I was introduced to boredom.

I thought actor Arya did not deserve a hot seat in the Tamil films. I opted to change after Sarvam.

I thought if you didn’t have a Barbie doll in your childhood, it was a shame. The recent adulterated styles of Barbie furnished an aversion in me.

I thought to be cool, clothes made a great part. Now, clothes are great but to be real cool, try brains.

I thought Pink was a girl’s color. I refuse to change ; so those film makers who get their heroes wear pink suits, please, for the sake of basic way of life, be aware, pink IS STILL A GIRL’S COLOR!!

I thought Autumn was something to be experienced in the western countries. You should take a drive on the Coimbatore-Palakkad highway during August-September.

I thought time played a good chance to chill between farm duties. But it proved to be a rear-view mirror. Objects are closer than they appear.

I thought it was better to have a job that paid than to be friends with nothing. I say, it’s much better to make something out of nothing than a job that pays but sucks.

I thought fashion magazines were a cool heap of pictures to lose yourself into. Well, that was long ago. If you ask me now, there’s nothing worse to waste your time and money on than fashion magazines.

I thought I would never look for those old cassettes I used to love when I was a kid. When we stripped our house of the clutter, I fondly dusted them and put them back though I no longer owned a cassette player.

I thought the queen of England was an evil witch until I lately stumbled over some great writing about her life.

I thought Mathematics was a simple art of numbers which required only a basic knowledge of multiplication tables. I scored a 16 on 100 in class 9. I have hated Mathematics ever since.

I thought the Internet was the best medium to touch base with the world. A kid-neighbor took me by arm for a run on the grass and asked me, “ do you know the best thing to do ?” My silence replied for him and he went “to take your shoes off and run on the grass”. That meant something.

yeh dosti na ho to, kya phir bolo ye zindagi hai...

We were pretty edgy those days. But then anybody having to put up with an evil boss is doomed to negative mood fluctuations. That’s considered normal biological reaction. So to put out the fire that was burning in our eyes for weeks, we decided we would use the weekend to wash out . After about 100 suggestions and debates, we chose this serene beach that was in the suburb of the city. Nothing to complain, it came with a resort and Smith knew the place very well. Thumbs up, everyone. Friday evening. Happy weekends-Byes- Have Funs, exchanged. We were six in the gang. But Titto always gave a don’t-you-do-that-to-me look whenever we tried to woo him with a plan. No gimmicks could buy him. So that reduced us to five-Smith,Pinks,Lav,Meerkut and me. Considering having and not having Titto would literally mean the same, we were quite fine and decided not to push him. 6:00 PM; Smith was talking about when she would come to pick us all the next day. She was the chauffeur of this so called self-propelled vehicle. Commutation was never a question as long as Smith was there. So getting back to the plan, discussion hit heights on when we should leave and things to do and the like. Meerkut was lost in google images, as usual.

Lav had other plans but because we threatened him, he agreed he would come, though the flip side of his brain was seriously working on how to wriggle out. I am sure of this because he didn’t turn up the next day.

“Meerkut, 9:00 AM ok?”, I asked

She threw a look which seemed to say whatever, just get lost.

“Meerkut?”, Smith went

This time she put a face like she has committed some serious crime.

“God, Meerkut, did your program bomb?” Smith raised an eyebrow. She was in no mood to bid bye to her Friday evening and do some binge recovery.

“Nope, nothing actually”.

We let out a sigh of relief and continued our discussion.

“Actually, “, Meerkut started

Meerkut was called “The actually Meerkut”. You wouldn’t find any sentence that came out of her, with out this word actually.

We paused, when Meerkut says actually and stops, it’s not good news.

I clenched my fist,prepared to give a blow, if she were to say she was not joining us for the trip.
“Actually…”, Meerkut went for the second time.
Nobody said anything.

“My dad wants to see me sooooo much”. That sooooooo was long enough for my fist to tighten harder and my breath to wheeze faster.

“Would you mind if I just drop out?” And she put up a face like that cute puppy on that Pedigree ad.

Meerkut is basically beautiful but under such occassions, beautiful faces didn’t really count.

That’s it. I was going to say something real bad that she would never talk to me again.
Smith gave a pat on my arm, something that acts like aspirin for that gushing headache.

“How can you..” I started
Meerkut held onto the puppy face.

Smith did the talking. For a while, they were talking.

It was our first weekend plan after months and we were so desperate to get some break. It seemed like a Monday morning when Meerkut came up with this reason to back out. GOD.I hate it when girls throw tantrums.

I sat there pretending to work, hating Meerkut for being so daddy’s girl, but all my senses were fixed on what Meerkut and Smith were saying. I wondered how could somebody be so calmly responding when someone busts a plan like this at the last minute.

Finally, I saw Smith hugging Meerkut. She gave a peck on Meerkut’s cheek and said, 'it’s okay sweetie, you go on'.

What the heck? They looked like they were exchanging congratulations like you do when marriages are fixed.

Meerkut turned to me. I turned away. I am not good at handling such situations.

Finally, Meerkut picked her bag, pretended to put an apologetic face again, and hugged Smith with a smile as if Smith was the one who let her free from a plan to clean the city’s drainage.

Titto didn’t come. Lav wasn’t sure. And now Meerkut, gone.

I was as angry as a tiger, okay, tigress, when Smith came to me, smiled and said it was ok. I put a face which said how could she do this and how could you let her go.

That’s Smith for you, she can understand everyone even if it meant getting ditched at the last minute.

She was helpless, she had to go (Smith’s version of Meerkut backing out).
She ditched us (my version).

So I thought the plan was down in the dumps; no point sitting across the beach and making faces at your own shadows. We were not the Dil Chahta Hai trio, you know.

But the next morning, Smith and Pinks were at my door, right at 9:00 AM and guess what, we drove like Schumacer, ate like that famous Peter guy (who broke records for maximum eating), sang like American Idols, cycled like (I don’t know any renowned cyclist’s name) and told each other stories from our own lives as the sun made a face to go down. By the end of it, I felt, it was actually like that song in Dil Chahta Hai, though Meerkut,Lav and Titto were terribly missed.

That was one of the best days we had. I thought it wouldn’t happen. But that’s Smith, for you; she makes things happen.

Meerkut and I did not talk for a week but made up after she brought us all a yummy chocolate clad marble cake.

After so many days, so many changes, I am sitting here alone today, missing those beautiful moments which really did not mean much then, but make my life a lot richer when I think of ’em.

With all my heart and love, Happy Birthday, Smith !

The musings by 'The Muse'

She calls me ‘The muse’. Of course, I obviously do the harder part of creative thinking and imaginative writing, while she simply types out whatever I tell her. But basically, I am a mouse; a simple, intelligent, frustrated hybrid of white and gray. For as long as I can reckon, I live inside the head of the self proclaimed author of this blog, who steals my identity and regenerates my ideas, conveniently stamping those under her copyrights.
I love being me. It’s cool kinda being the pool of ideas to someone. It makes me feel good. Actually, it MADE me feel good. Yes, when she used to write something, sometime in the least to mention. I had a purpose. I loved to think. And always did my ground work on what to write next. I’m pretty smart, thinking, trying and raring to go. And like any other mouse, I loved eating coconut flakes and oatmeal. I thought I had a good life to live until my brain attained self actualization one day to realize the fact that this girl I live in is nothing bigger than a sleepy head!!
I mean, she has got a BIG head and a bigger nose, none of which serves any purpose to her existence, except for the breathing part to hold her alive. But if I had that big a nose, I would take a course on the art of sniffing and become like that little rat in the film Ratatouille. I would have written a book for my fellow mice family on how to think and lead better rat lives.
She stopped eating coconut and oatmeal, two of my favorite food. She says coconut is unhealthy and oatmeal makes her sick. But the real reason, I repent not being able to shout, is that she is one lazy bum to shred coconut into food. If coconut is unhealthy, god forbid those gummy jars of mayonnaise that sucks the life outta me every time she gulps down. And I have to run like crazy all over because it makes me sick!!
Okay, coming back to writing. After truck loads of motivating speeches and inspirational quotes about how those people do so many things in life and still manage to do what they want, out of sheer frustration, on this New Year’s, I renounced the idea of getting her to write. She wouldn’t anyways. And when she sits to write, her head turns towards her right shoulder (I have always wondered why she does that; come on, I sit on the left side of her brain) and gawk with a blatant look as if the words had promised to just break out of the wall on her right side!! She sits there so long gaping at the wall that I eventually fall asleep and then she leaves, sighing and wagging her hands that, I got a writer’s block today.
As if she writes great stuff every other day!
It’s like a yardstick rapped up on your knuckles!
It’s like that monster -website’s ad where you are actually a star but stuck up in a job that sucks!
It’s like you are ready to do homework, but the teacher wouldn’t give any!
I am exhausted and I have given up !! I am just done with living inside this dork-head.
So if there’s a soul out there who can be gracious enough to adopt me, then please, here I am, waiting to be all yours. I am pretty smart, quick and funny. Well yea, if you are a coconut lover, then I am more than willing!!!

Like I have always read in fairy tales, I am here, hoping and waiting for my foster soul.
Yours,
The Muse
(Actually, I would like to be called Sir. Wicky Ratington)

Sweeter than chocolate, softer than butter..

We sat in that rusty pie shop,the first time we shared an evening. The one on the 4th cross street, just two blocks away from where I lived. I have always been here, ever since I got to know pies and cakes. He was shy and that was nice. It was a first time, for me with a boy and for him in that pie shop. I waited for him to choose his favorite. “What do you like”, he asked me.

“ Umm, I have already placed my order and you?”

“An apple pie, with some melted yellow cheese and a coffee”, he winked at me and smiled at the waitress.

That made me smirk, rather sheepishly but I pretended to be such a cool person.
He had been my neighbor for four years and sure he would know what nuts I was made of or he didn’t care. But I knew his; bike lover, jogger, weekend smoker, shoe lover, sexy stubbles, black hair, clean nails, cute smile, well, pretty much of my kind, except for the smoking part.

I liked him and every one in my life knew that. Why didn’t I tell him? Because he had someone else in his life. Why am I here today then? Because we both were at the pie shop, in two different tables, alone and didn’t know what to do when our eyes and smiles exchanged greetings.
The table looked so clean and round that it was like a painted canvas when it was filled with our pies and coffee. My Coconut cream cake did to me what water does to lungs after an exhaustive jog. I wanted something bar my slobber to stroke my throat. It’s ok, I felt better and asked

“How come you alone here?”

“Why not?”, he replied with his pie and a smile and yet managed to keep his mouth half closed.

“What happened to you girlfriend?”

“What?” Alright. Those days, it wasn’t so easy or cool to be talking about love affairs, you see.

I munched on my pie and went, “your girlfriend, I have seen you here with her”.
He waited for the pie to be patiently swallowed and said “We are not together now” and gently smiled.

It was like how you felt when a plane you are in, takes off. Suddenly, the coconut cream pie and the raspberry sauce on top of it was the most exotic thing to eat in the whole world.

“Hmm, it’s wonderful, you should try it sometime”. The cheese neatly dripped and fell in place on top of his apple pie. Ohh yea, it must be. “The coffee goes well with it”, he said, sipping.
Nodding was the only thing I found sensible to do.

“I may be moving out of this town soon, will miss all these”. Smile intact, voice cool, he said that to put out a moment of joy that was gushing inside my veins. Yea, best things in life are free and come in small packages.

Fifteen minutes and a few heavy heart beats later, I decided I should leave. There was no point sitting with a guy who seemed to have his life all sorted out. I knew he didn’t feel the way I did for him.

I paid though he insisted that I let him.

I picked my bag, smiled at him and got up “Listen, there’s something I want to tell you. I have always liked you. I have known you for some time. And I think you are..” I didn’t have a word to complete it but went on “Anyways, I think it doesn’t make any sense now. If you ever think you like me, just give a call. I smiled like I would to a friend. “Bye and have a good life”, and walked off.

He called me from where he was.

“Hmmm ?” I didn’t know how he felt but I was pretty cool to just move on.

“I don’t have your number”

“Why do you need?”

“To tell you I like you”. He still sat there with a paper napkin in his hand. The only other thing I
could see in the entire world was nothing. Taking one sip of coffee as if to feed some reality, he smiled, yet again.

The usual chaos went on in the café’ with laughter and the clatter of coffee mugs, my heart tickled and that moment seemed just bloody perfect.

A year later.

The waitress passed on a warm smile saying, ”Apple pie with melted yellow cheese and two coffees?”

And we replied in unison “Yes, Please”.

One is not born a woman, one becomes one.

--Simone de Beauvoir:
A popular foward, I customised in my own thoughts and then words.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Read a few great books which changed her thinking, taught her how the earth moved and kept her company during lonely times

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
A handful of friends outside her family, whom she can trust any day

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Travelled alone

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Had a career for herself at least once in her life

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Presentable nails and hair

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Clothing that she finds herself beautiful in

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Dreams about her future and some guts to make them happen

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
One pair of jewel that her grandchildren will be proud to call their grandmom’s

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Her own collection of music, books, recipes that she is willing to share

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Fallen in love

*****
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
How a bank account works

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
At least one perfect dessert to make on any occasion

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
To shake hands gently & firmly with a man

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
To smile at a kid even in times of distress

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
To trust herself beyond anybody else

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
Her parents’ birthdays & anniversaries

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
At least one story to tell the kids the way they like it

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW
God. Believing or disbelieving him is a different question altogether.

Sometimes when the day is dark...

...the only way to light up the spirit is by hugging the memories and smiling over’em.

Moments of my life I lost my heart to..

*A month off in Chennai during final year, all in the name of project

*Icecream in Corner House,Bangalore
*Those rides in college bus.

*Late night phone calls that used to sometimes last till dawn.

*Staying over with friends, watching movies, playing and talking all night.
*Gulab Jamuns,especiailly the ones made on the eve of Diwali.
*First movie, bunking class
*Rides on Scooty

*A R Rahman's creations

*Group studies right the day before semester
*Morning walks in Indra Nagar,Bangalore

*Chilli Gobi at Nandinee

*Alaipayuthe, the movie
*First days on Orkut
*Chilling out over bajji with Smith,Meerkut n Pinks
*Afternoon drives with Smith & Meerkut

*Vacation after 12th standard school

*Life with BUGFRENTS

*Idlis with ghee from MTR,Bangalore
*Drives in Bangalore
*Westlife

*Bushra's friendship

*Backstreet Boys

*The warm aroma of Cookies from Forum,Bangalore
*Movies at Forum
*View of New York in the night from plane
*Mountain Dew from College canteen
*Vaseegara song from Minnale

*Denzel Washington in Crimson Tide,Siege
*Munnar
*Orange Souffle

*Undomestic Goddess, The book

*Evenings with music in a crowded park
*Princess Diana
*Evenings in Beasant Nagar Beach
*Dove chocolate

*Holi at Pune
*Jacqueline Wilson, the author

*Walks thru' MG Road,Pune
*Early morning bus rides through the suburbs of Nagercoil
*Barbie Vanilla Cake flavored perfume
*Madhuri Dixit
*Cricket World Cup, 1996

*Sunsets in Beach on December 31st
*Everybody Loves Raymond, TV Series

*Evenings spent at Jaffrin's house

*10th std trip to Kodaikanal
*Chilli Beef
*Kenny Rogers
*The Beatles
*Friday evening drives to Nagercoil
*College,College,College & College, every minute of it.

1 2 3...Tiramisu !!

Pic courtesy :Google (but o'course ! )
Now, I am not slowly starting to invoke any recipes onto my blog or even attempting to copy them from cookery sites/blogs. Though I must attribute a major chunk of my idle hours to those brave efforts spent over studious references to some cookbooks & websites in my steaming hot kitchen, trying to form an edible mass, I am not a gourmet chef and I don’t blog recipes. There are zillions of great bloggers who are good at it. But I just wanted to tell you this. If you have not yet tasted this Italian classic lady love that stands tall among the best loved desserts of all time, you have missed something your tongue will adore.Do find out a decent Italian restaurant that serves authentic Tiramisu (I say authentic because it has to have the lady finger cake, the coffee liquor and the marscapone cheese and these are not easily available). Try it and you would be happy you did. Of all my times spent on hungry scanning of recipe pages and and pantry experiments, I always wanted to try out a genuine Tiramisu and never could. I finally could make it,hmm, I wouldn’t really say make IT ‘coz I couldn’t find the marscapone cheese (used ordinary cream cheese mixed with whipped cream that makes a substitute) and skipped the liquor. So, this was somewhere close to Tiramisu but not exactly it. Talk about over held temptations! I was driving around and my car wouldn’t move past the entry point of this Italian restaurant. And yea, my tummy roared in joy with the feel of first byte of the much awaited dessert tickling down my body. There you go one..two..three, an affair to ditch other crushes for, if you own a sweet tooth, just like that !